Life or Death 1/5
Jul. 10th, 2013 10:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
write_my_dreamsTitle: Life or Death
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
write_my_dreams
Pairing: Atsushi x Asagi
Genre: AU, historical, romance, angst
Warning/Disclaimer: Warning for illness and drama later in this fic. Asagi and Atsushi do not belong to me. The universe, the character portrayals, and the writing do though.
Rating: PG
Chapters: 1/5
Summary: Atsushi is struggling to adapt to the new technologies of the Meiji Period and often hides out in the countryside where little has changed for the last century. Out in the country, he meets Asagi: a young and beautiful, but sickly, human who quickly wins his heart. When Asagi falls ill with a fatal disease Atsushi must decide between saving Asagi's life by turning him into a vampire or keeping him human and letting him slip into death.
Author's Comment: Various scenes from "Life or Death" have been haunting me for the last few months. It feels good to start writing this again. I'm still deciding exactly when this takes place but it's sometime in the late 1800s. I tried to make the dialogue sound more formal/old-fashioned to fit with the time period.
For hours, the stars and the night creatures had been Atsushi’s sole companions. He wasn’t sure where he was—not lost; to be lost one had to have a clear destination in mind. It was rare for Atsushi to have a travel destination. He went wherever the road took him. Sometimes he went to cities, other times he lingered in small, farming towns that had changed very little in the last two hundred years. He felt more at home in those tiny villages. They, like him, were a product of a previous era. Modern cities made him anxious. Pale foreigners with strange hair and eye colors, the trains and metal ships that spewed out smoke that made his eyes water… But he and his beloved Yuuki had agreed to separate, to familiarize themselves with this new world before it left them behind and turned them into relics of the past. And so, every time Atsushi hid out in the countryside, he felt guilty. But cities made him uneasy and he felt alone.
Sighing softly, Atsushi adjusted his pack. There was little chance of finding a city out in these rolling hills. Sometimes the road disappeared into thick forests only to spit him out again beyond the trees. This “pattern” had continued for the last three days with no sign of a human. Atsushi knew he needed to leave this isolated lands behind. Although he could last several days without blood, he didn’t want to risk being in a place where there was no chance of drinking human blood. Surviving on animal blood was… unpleasant, but possible. And something he’d had to do before when he wandered too deep into the countryside. Once he reached the top of this hill he could survey the land and see if there was a town anywhere near.
Atsushi paused at the top of the hill. Judging by the moon’s position there were still another five hours until dawn. He would need shelter before sunrise… either he retreated back into the forest or kept going. Atsushi hesitated as he glanced back. Surely it was better to continue to follow the road that twisted over the hills. Atsushi abandoned his leisurely pace and ran down the hill, moving at the vampire speeds he’d long grown accustomed to.
At least he could truly be himself in these parts of the world.
* * *
Another day passed without any sighting of a farm or town. There were hoof marks and wheel ruts in the road though, signs that people had been here. Atsushi hoped to encounter these people soon. Ever since awakening, he’d felt pangs of thirst. It had started to bother him yesterday but was worse tonight. He tried not to focus on his thirst as he continued running.
The tracks continued down the road. Within half an hour, the wind changed to blow in Atsushi’s direction. It carried the smell of flowers, horses, and human life. Somewhere ahead of him were people. Perhaps this was some wealthy man’s country home? Or a temple. Atsushi slowed to a human’s pace as he reached the top of a hill. Down below was a valley with a river cutting through it. The road branched off towards a fine looking manor. Behind it was a stable and to the right of the house was a beautiful garden. A manor like this required servants. Atsushi took no pride in admitting that seducing servants for their blood (or more) had never been difficult.
He started running again. Atsushi slowed to a human pace as he neared the manor, suddenly self-conscious. What if someone was outside and had seen him? Or looked out the window? No… surely they wouldn’t see him. His shoulder-length black hair and black clothing made it easy for him to blend in with the night.
Atsushi paused to breathe in the scent of life. He could smell humans in the stable and in the manor… but also one in the garden. The garden was best; he could drink blood without fear of spooking the horses or being discovered. And then flee into the night. Atsushi approached the garden then froze as he heard singing. The voice would be inaudible to human ears but so clear to a vampire’s. The singer was male, the words and voice beautiful. Atsushi automatically started walking faster. Who possessed this angelic voice?
As he reached the garden, Atsushi immediately winced and covered his eyes. The man in the garden carried a lantern on a staff. Atsushi’s eyes, accustomed to starlight and moonlight, ached from the lantern’s brightness. He forced his eyes open, squinting as he waited for them to adjust. The singer’s back was turned to Atsushi so it was impossible to his face. He had silky, waist-length hair and wore a grey yukata with a pattern of dark blue roses. Clasped in his left hand was the staff from which the lantern hung. His sleeve had fallen back to expose one pale wrist. Atsushi felt his fangs threatening to emerge. Angrily, he pushed them back with his tongue. He wanted to see this man’s face before he considered biting him. Atsushi blinked as he realized the man seemed to be singing to the red rosebush in front of him. Singing… to flowers? Was no human willing to listen to such a beautiful voice?
Atsushi was spellbound as the man turned. He brushed his hair back behind his ear to reveal more of that pale (almost as pale as Atsushi himself), perfect face. He was easily one of the most gorgeous men that the vampire had ever seen. Atsushi watched as the man smiled then leaned down to pet a grey and white cat. The smile made his face and eyes light up. His happiness made him even more beautiful than he already was. Atsushi’s fangs threatened to present themselves but he angrily shoved them back. The mere thought of drinking this beautiful creature’s blood sickened him. Atsushi couldn’t—wouldn't—do it.
The man sighed softly as he reached out to touch one of the roses. “I suppose we should return to the manor before my doctor comes looking for me.” He glanced down at the cat, smiling fondly as the little animal batted at his hair. The man stood then dusted off his yukata. He took a step towards the manor then stopped, gripping his staff tightly for support as he started to cough. His lantern trembled with his body, making Atsushi wince as the light fell on himself. Should he reveal himself or flee? His decision was made when the man raised his head and looked right at him. Shocked, he raised the lantern to get a better look at him then blushed deeply.
“Oh!” He ducked his head to hide beneath his long hair. “I… I was unaware that I had company.” In a lower voice that was meant to be heard only by his cat (yet easily audible to Atsushi)— “How embarrassing! To catch me singing to roses and you, Minya. Surely he must think me mad.”
Atsushi hid a smile. Mad? No, he didn’t think that. This man was fond of his cat and his roses. If he enjoyed singing to them then that was his choice. Wealthy men had done stranger things before. “Forgive me for disturbing you,” he apologized. “I… I have been alone for some days. When I saw your manor, I couldn’t stay away. And then I heard your song…” he took a step closer. “You have one of the most beautiful voices that I have ever heard.” He smiled as that made the other man blush again. There was something… adorable about his blushing.
“I did not intend for anyone to hear me sing, but thank you for your kind words.” The man brushed his hair back. “I hope you do not think me absurd for singing to my roses and my cat.”
“No,” Atsushi said softly. “Clearly it brings you pleasure so how could I think you absurd?”
That earned him a smile. “Who are you, traveler? My name is Asagi.” He coughed again then winced as he rubbed his chest. “I’m sorry. My health has been poor all my life. It’s why I spend most of the year here.”
His health explained why he was so pale then. “I understand. Where is the rest of your family? Are they here with you?”
“My parents and siblings are in Tokyo.” Asagi sighed softly. “I miss my family but when I am in Tokyo, I cough even more and have headaches. Sometimes my family comes here to visit me but there isn’t always time. Still, I enjoy this manor. It’s peaceful here.”
Atsushi nodded. “Then at least your health, not your home, is the problem. You are fortune to call a beautiful place like this home.” Atsushi had seen terrible living places over the years. One of the worst being the frozen outpost in the north where he’d met Yuuki.
“That’s true. I’m sorry, I’ve yet to hear your name.”
“My name is Atsushi.” He didn’t bother to elaborate further.
“Atsushi the traveler?”
The vampire gave Asagi a faint smile. “Something like that.”
Asagi started to speak but broke into a fit of coughing. Worried, Atsushi moved closer. He laid a hand on Asagi’s shoulder then tentatively rubbed his back. “Are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” the other man replied in a raspy voice.
“You don’t sound fine.”
Asagi sighed softly. “I appreciate your concern for my health, but I’ve been coughing for the last three weeks. There’s little I can do for it.”
Coughing for three weeks? That was alarming. Why was he outside in the garden when he should be abed? Atsushi gave him a gentle nudge towards the door. “I understand. But please, go inside and rest.” The best thing Asagi could do for himself was to drink some tea to help with his throat then lie down. Remembering the cat, Atsushi glanced around and found Minya rolling in the grass. Someone was enjoying himself.
Asagi sighed as he rubbed his throat. “I suppose I should… though I’d prefer to stay here and enjoy the night air.” He approached the door. Minya, seeing his master about to leave, padded over to him. Atsushi could only stare for a few moments. Never had he seen a cat that followed a human around like a dog! It was sweet though. And surely Minya would like to lie by Asagi and purr. Incentive for him to lie down. “Come in and stay the night, Atsushi. You must be weary from traveling.”
“Thank you.” Atsushi was grateful for the invitation. Partially because he didn’t want to sleep outdoors again and partially because of what he was. A vampire could not enter someone’s home without their permission or invitation. If Asagi hadn’t expressed verbal permission then Atsushi wouldn’t be able to enter. And he did want to stay here.
He followed Asagi into the manor. A worried maid immediately pounced, taking the lantern from Asagi.
“A bath has been prepared for you and the doctor has already laid out your medicine. Would you like to take it with tea?” she asked, giving Atsushi a brief glance before returning her attention to Asagi. He could see that she genuinely cared about the other man. Servants who were treated well were always more likely to care for their employers.
Asagi brushed his hair back. “I’ll take my medicine later. Atsushi, would you like to bathe?”
“Yes,” Atsushi replied immediately. Although he liked the solitude that nature offered him, he loathed having to bathe in a stream.
He frowned as Asagi started to cough again. “Asagi… you need to take your medicine,” he said softly.
“He’s right,” the maid said.
“I’m fine,” Asagi insisted once he could breathe normally again. He sighed then leaned down to gather Minya into his arms. He cuddled the cat against his chest before glancing at Atsushi. “I’ll have the servants prepare a bath and a room for you. Are you hungry?”
The dreaded question. Atsushi would have to eat something later to avoid arousing suspicion but if he tried now, he would probably make himself ill. “No, I made myself dinner earlier.” His actual “meal” would have to wait until the majority of the household was abed. He felt terrible for preying on Asagi’s servants, but he needed blood.
Asagi nodded. “I’ll show you around the manor while your bath is being prepared.”
“What about yours?” Atsushi asked, frowning. “Won’t your bathwater get cold?”
Asagi shook his head. “The servants can always add extra heat to keep it warm for me.”
“I see.” Atsushi followed him as Asagi started to describe the manor. There were two levels in the manor. The family’s rooms were on the upper level while the kitchen, the study, and the servant’s quarters were on the lower level. There was also a cellar for storing wine and food. It seemed like a comfortable place to live. Especially when Asagi mentioned the natural hot spring a mere half hour’s ride from the manor. Atsushi would have to visit that when he left this place.
* * *
After bathing, a maid showed Atsushi to his room. It had the look of a room that hadn’t been lived in for some time. There were few personal effects to the room. There was a chest for clothes, a small table, and the futon that had already been laid out for him. The windows made him anxious though. They were glass and drawn with shutters, but the shutters still let in light. Atsushi would need to cover them to protect himself from the sun. That was a matter he could deal with later though. Until then he would enjoy the feeling of being properly clean, wearing clean clothing, and brushing his hair out with a proper comb instead of his fingers.
Atsushi was sitting on his futon doing just that when he sensed Asagi’s presence outside the room. He could see his outline through the shoji. Judging by the smell Asagi had brought some tea with him. Worried the other man would start coughing again and end up dropping the tea, Atsushi quickly got up so he could let Asagi into the room. Like him, Asagi’s hair was damp and he’d changed his clothing. He didn’t look quite so pale anymore either. But that was only from the heat of the water.
“Oh!” Asagi looked surprised. “I’m sorry… I’m sure you desire to rest but I thought you might like some tea.”
“I’m not tired,” Atsushi replied. “And I would like some tea.” He stepped aside so Asagi could enter. “How is your throat?”
Asagi sighed. “My throat and chest are sore from coughing. But,” he smiled sadly. “I’m used to it.” Atsushi wondered how often he was sick. Alarmed, he took the tray as Asagi started to cough. He held the tray with one hand then ushered Asagi over to the low table so he could sit. Once he’d done so Atsushi set the tray on the table. He filled a cup with the green tea then nudged it towards his host. Watching a coughing human made him anxious, especially if they were as kind and beautiful as Asagi.
“You should be resting,” Atsushi said softly. “Your health should be your priority not that of a simple traveler you’ve just met.” He didn’t want this man to exhaust himself for his sake. Atsushi wasn’t worth it and didn’t need to be tended to like a human.
Asagi coughed again then shook his head. “I would make a poor host if I focused solely on my health. And I have already spent most of the day abed… if I spent the rest of the night in bed as well I think I shall scream.”
Atsushi couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Such is the price of illness.” Asagi had yet to touch his tea so Atsushi, again, pushed the cup closer to him. This time Asagi took the unsubtle hint and sipped his tea. “Thank you for letting me into your home.”
He blinked as Asagi smiled again. Poor thing… he must be so lonely if this could make him so happy.
“You’re welcome. But how could I not have invited you? I would never force someone to stay out in the dark.”
“Are there any villages nearby?” This would give Atsushi a chance to learn what else was here besides the manor.
“Two hours by horseback. It’s a little remote, but my father wanted a peaceful location for when he grew weary of the city. My mother also stayed here during her pregnancies. It was more relaxing for her to live here than it was for her to be in Tokyo.”
Atsushi nodded. That was understandable. He was about to say something but paused as Asagi began to speak again. “My parents would like to spend more time here, but my father runs a business. If he isn’t in Tokyo then who will run the business for him? So he stays… he’ll bring me little presents and news. Until my family visits, the world might as well end with this manor. I know little of what goes on in the outside world.” He gave Atsushi a hopeful look.
The vampire sighed. “You won’t hear much from me. I’ve spent much of the last years away from the cities.” Not wanting to let the tea get cold, he took a sip. Ah… to have such delicious tea was a rare treat. He sipped it again then set the cup down. He could see that Asagi was burning with curiosity but too polite to simply start asking questions. “I’m a painter,” he explained. Sort of. He got bored out by himself and needed some sort of hobby to entertain himself. “I prefer the beauty of nature for my paintings. I seek out towns when I need food and grow weary of the woods.”
Asagi looked curious. “May I see your work?”
“Of course.” Atsushi left the table to get his pack. He opened it then pulled out the thick, waterproof case that he used to store his paintings. He handed it to Asagi, watching his face as he looked through Atsushi’s work. By no means did Atsushi think of himself as a master painter. Painting was something he’d enjoyed as a human and he’d continued to improve his paintings throughout his years as a vampire. And it gave him the perfect excuse for travelling. He could also sell paintings if he needed money for lodging or supplies.
“These are beautiful,” Asagi said, eyes wide as he looked up at Atsushi.
“Ah, they’re not that special,” Atsushi laughed awkwardly as he rubbed the back of his neck.
Asagi shook his head. “There’s no need to be modest! These are truly beautiful.”
“You can keep some of them if you like,” Atsushi replied.
Asagi’s eyes widened. “You would give me your paintings?”
“Of course. You’ve opened your home to me so I would like to give you something in return.”
Asagi beamed at him. “Thank you. May I… keep your roses?” He clearly loved roses.
Atsushi nodded, earning himself another happy smile. Looking at Asagi suddenly made him feel anxious. Staying for longer than this one night could be dangerous. Asagi was so sweet and charming that it’d be all too easy to care for him. To develop feelings for him. And what good would that do but shatter Atsushi’s heart into a thousand pieces? Asagi’s poor health proved that Death had already laid eyes on him.
“Thank you.” Asagi carefully set the paintings of roses aside. He abruptly started coughing again, almost dropping the case. He set it down then rubbed his chest. Worried, Atsushi moved over to him. Immediately he had to bite his lip. Asagi’s movements had made his yukata slip down to reveal more of his pale throat. Just one bite… Furious, Atsushi shoved the thoughts away. He would not bite Asagi. The vampire gently adjusted the yukata, fingers brushing Asagi’s skin. He jerked his hand back as he felt the heat radiating from Asagi’s skin. Now he was feverish.
He hesitated then abruptly lifted the other up into his arms. Surely this was unspeakably rude but Asagi was ill and needed to rest, whether he wanted to or not.
“Atsushi!” Alarmed, Asagi clutched the front of his yukata. “Please, put me down. I’m too heavy.”
“No you’re not. I know the thought of being confined to your bed again makes you want to scream but please, consider your health. You have a fever.”
Asagi sighed loudly as he relented. “All right.” He didn’t protest again as Atsushi carried him to his room. The servants must have prepared it for him while he was in the bath since the futon had been laid out for him. Atsushi gently set him on his futon before pulling back.
“Did you take your medicine?” The maid had mentioned medicine when Asagi first brought Atsushi into the manor.
“I have. The tea I brought you is supposed to help with my health… I thought it would do you good to have some as well. Traveling is always tiring.” Asagi sat up then raked his long hair back. “I’m sorry, I won’t be able to make a good host for you tonight.” He smiled sadly. “Again, my health confines me to my room.”
Atsushi pitied him. Asagi was so bright and lively… yet a prisoner in his own body. “Shh, there’s no need to apologize. You’ve been a wonderful host. You’ve given me a bath, some tea, and a place to stay the night. I couldn’t be happier.”
The words seemed to comfort Asagi. “I guess… I should get some sleep,” he said quietly. “And so should you. You must be tired.”
If only Asagi knew the truth. “I… I am not tired, actually. I mostly travel by night.” He didn’t want to confess his affliction to sunlight, but Asagi should know why his new guest would be unwilling to step outside during the day. And why he would cover the windows in his room.
Asagi’s eyes widened. “The night? Why? How can you possibly see well enough to travel?”
“I travel at night because I must,” Atsushi said quietly. “The sunlight, for some reason, bothers my skin. I feel ill if I stay out in daylight for too long. This is why I am so pale.”
Asagi bit his lip. “I’m sorry. That must be so difficult…”
“It can be. My eyes have learned to adjust to the darkness though and I have seen plenty of beautiful things at night.”
Asagi nodded. “I guess you won’t be tired for some time then. If you would prefer, a maid can cover the windows in your room so it’s easier for you to sleep.”
“Thank you.” Now Atsushi wouldn’t have to see how awkward it would be to request this himself. He took a step back. “I should let you rest.”
Asagi pulled his hair over his chest, absently running his fingers through it. He looked as if he wanted to continue the conversation. Atsushi wouldn’t mind speaking to him more… if Asagi were healthy. “If there’s something you need, send for one of the servants. They will tend to your needs.”
Atsushi decided he would borrow a lamp so he could paint in Asagi’s garden. It’d be interesting to paint by lamplight instead of moonlight or merely his own dark-accustomed eyes. “I will do so. Good night, Asagi.”
“Good night.” Atsushi waited until Asagi was lying down before leaving the room.
Notes
1) I'm going to work on the Art of Denial and try to get a chapter or two done while I figure out more details for Life or Death. I have a rough timeline figured out but I need to decide just how much of Asagi and Atsushi's relationship I want to write.
2) Poor Asagi... it's going to be hard to abuse him in this fic. He's so sweet and innocent.
Author:
write_my_dreamsPairing: Atsushi x Asagi
Genre: AU, historical, romance, angst
Warning/Disclaimer: Warning for illness and drama later in this fic. Asagi and Atsushi do not belong to me. The universe, the character portrayals, and the writing do though.
Rating: PG
Chapters: 1/5
Summary: Atsushi is struggling to adapt to the new technologies of the Meiji Period and often hides out in the countryside where little has changed for the last century. Out in the country, he meets Asagi: a young and beautiful, but sickly, human who quickly wins his heart. When Asagi falls ill with a fatal disease Atsushi must decide between saving Asagi's life by turning him into a vampire or keeping him human and letting him slip into death.
Author's Comment: Various scenes from "Life or Death" have been haunting me for the last few months. It feels good to start writing this again. I'm still deciding exactly when this takes place but it's sometime in the late 1800s. I tried to make the dialogue sound more formal/old-fashioned to fit with the time period.
For hours, the stars and the night creatures had been Atsushi’s sole companions. He wasn’t sure where he was—not lost; to be lost one had to have a clear destination in mind. It was rare for Atsushi to have a travel destination. He went wherever the road took him. Sometimes he went to cities, other times he lingered in small, farming towns that had changed very little in the last two hundred years. He felt more at home in those tiny villages. They, like him, were a product of a previous era. Modern cities made him anxious. Pale foreigners with strange hair and eye colors, the trains and metal ships that spewed out smoke that made his eyes water… But he and his beloved Yuuki had agreed to separate, to familiarize themselves with this new world before it left them behind and turned them into relics of the past. And so, every time Atsushi hid out in the countryside, he felt guilty. But cities made him uneasy and he felt alone.
Sighing softly, Atsushi adjusted his pack. There was little chance of finding a city out in these rolling hills. Sometimes the road disappeared into thick forests only to spit him out again beyond the trees. This “pattern” had continued for the last three days with no sign of a human. Atsushi knew he needed to leave this isolated lands behind. Although he could last several days without blood, he didn’t want to risk being in a place where there was no chance of drinking human blood. Surviving on animal blood was… unpleasant, but possible. And something he’d had to do before when he wandered too deep into the countryside. Once he reached the top of this hill he could survey the land and see if there was a town anywhere near.
Atsushi paused at the top of the hill. Judging by the moon’s position there were still another five hours until dawn. He would need shelter before sunrise… either he retreated back into the forest or kept going. Atsushi hesitated as he glanced back. Surely it was better to continue to follow the road that twisted over the hills. Atsushi abandoned his leisurely pace and ran down the hill, moving at the vampire speeds he’d long grown accustomed to.
At least he could truly be himself in these parts of the world.
* * *
Another day passed without any sighting of a farm or town. There were hoof marks and wheel ruts in the road though, signs that people had been here. Atsushi hoped to encounter these people soon. Ever since awakening, he’d felt pangs of thirst. It had started to bother him yesterday but was worse tonight. He tried not to focus on his thirst as he continued running.
The tracks continued down the road. Within half an hour, the wind changed to blow in Atsushi’s direction. It carried the smell of flowers, horses, and human life. Somewhere ahead of him were people. Perhaps this was some wealthy man’s country home? Or a temple. Atsushi slowed to a human’s pace as he reached the top of a hill. Down below was a valley with a river cutting through it. The road branched off towards a fine looking manor. Behind it was a stable and to the right of the house was a beautiful garden. A manor like this required servants. Atsushi took no pride in admitting that seducing servants for their blood (or more) had never been difficult.
He started running again. Atsushi slowed to a human pace as he neared the manor, suddenly self-conscious. What if someone was outside and had seen him? Or looked out the window? No… surely they wouldn’t see him. His shoulder-length black hair and black clothing made it easy for him to blend in with the night.
Atsushi paused to breathe in the scent of life. He could smell humans in the stable and in the manor… but also one in the garden. The garden was best; he could drink blood without fear of spooking the horses or being discovered. And then flee into the night. Atsushi approached the garden then froze as he heard singing. The voice would be inaudible to human ears but so clear to a vampire’s. The singer was male, the words and voice beautiful. Atsushi automatically started walking faster. Who possessed this angelic voice?
As he reached the garden, Atsushi immediately winced and covered his eyes. The man in the garden carried a lantern on a staff. Atsushi’s eyes, accustomed to starlight and moonlight, ached from the lantern’s brightness. He forced his eyes open, squinting as he waited for them to adjust. The singer’s back was turned to Atsushi so it was impossible to his face. He had silky, waist-length hair and wore a grey yukata with a pattern of dark blue roses. Clasped in his left hand was the staff from which the lantern hung. His sleeve had fallen back to expose one pale wrist. Atsushi felt his fangs threatening to emerge. Angrily, he pushed them back with his tongue. He wanted to see this man’s face before he considered biting him. Atsushi blinked as he realized the man seemed to be singing to the red rosebush in front of him. Singing… to flowers? Was no human willing to listen to such a beautiful voice?
Atsushi was spellbound as the man turned. He brushed his hair back behind his ear to reveal more of that pale (almost as pale as Atsushi himself), perfect face. He was easily one of the most gorgeous men that the vampire had ever seen. Atsushi watched as the man smiled then leaned down to pet a grey and white cat. The smile made his face and eyes light up. His happiness made him even more beautiful than he already was. Atsushi’s fangs threatened to present themselves but he angrily shoved them back. The mere thought of drinking this beautiful creature’s blood sickened him. Atsushi couldn’t—wouldn't—do it.
The man sighed softly as he reached out to touch one of the roses. “I suppose we should return to the manor before my doctor comes looking for me.” He glanced down at the cat, smiling fondly as the little animal batted at his hair. The man stood then dusted off his yukata. He took a step towards the manor then stopped, gripping his staff tightly for support as he started to cough. His lantern trembled with his body, making Atsushi wince as the light fell on himself. Should he reveal himself or flee? His decision was made when the man raised his head and looked right at him. Shocked, he raised the lantern to get a better look at him then blushed deeply.
“Oh!” He ducked his head to hide beneath his long hair. “I… I was unaware that I had company.” In a lower voice that was meant to be heard only by his cat (yet easily audible to Atsushi)— “How embarrassing! To catch me singing to roses and you, Minya. Surely he must think me mad.”
Atsushi hid a smile. Mad? No, he didn’t think that. This man was fond of his cat and his roses. If he enjoyed singing to them then that was his choice. Wealthy men had done stranger things before. “Forgive me for disturbing you,” he apologized. “I… I have been alone for some days. When I saw your manor, I couldn’t stay away. And then I heard your song…” he took a step closer. “You have one of the most beautiful voices that I have ever heard.” He smiled as that made the other man blush again. There was something… adorable about his blushing.
“I did not intend for anyone to hear me sing, but thank you for your kind words.” The man brushed his hair back. “I hope you do not think me absurd for singing to my roses and my cat.”
“No,” Atsushi said softly. “Clearly it brings you pleasure so how could I think you absurd?”
That earned him a smile. “Who are you, traveler? My name is Asagi.” He coughed again then winced as he rubbed his chest. “I’m sorry. My health has been poor all my life. It’s why I spend most of the year here.”
His health explained why he was so pale then. “I understand. Where is the rest of your family? Are they here with you?”
“My parents and siblings are in Tokyo.” Asagi sighed softly. “I miss my family but when I am in Tokyo, I cough even more and have headaches. Sometimes my family comes here to visit me but there isn’t always time. Still, I enjoy this manor. It’s peaceful here.”
Atsushi nodded. “Then at least your health, not your home, is the problem. You are fortune to call a beautiful place like this home.” Atsushi had seen terrible living places over the years. One of the worst being the frozen outpost in the north where he’d met Yuuki.
“That’s true. I’m sorry, I’ve yet to hear your name.”
“My name is Atsushi.” He didn’t bother to elaborate further.
“Atsushi the traveler?”
The vampire gave Asagi a faint smile. “Something like that.”
Asagi started to speak but broke into a fit of coughing. Worried, Atsushi moved closer. He laid a hand on Asagi’s shoulder then tentatively rubbed his back. “Are you all right?”
“I’m fine,” the other man replied in a raspy voice.
“You don’t sound fine.”
Asagi sighed softly. “I appreciate your concern for my health, but I’ve been coughing for the last three weeks. There’s little I can do for it.”
Coughing for three weeks? That was alarming. Why was he outside in the garden when he should be abed? Atsushi gave him a gentle nudge towards the door. “I understand. But please, go inside and rest.” The best thing Asagi could do for himself was to drink some tea to help with his throat then lie down. Remembering the cat, Atsushi glanced around and found Minya rolling in the grass. Someone was enjoying himself.
Asagi sighed as he rubbed his throat. “I suppose I should… though I’d prefer to stay here and enjoy the night air.” He approached the door. Minya, seeing his master about to leave, padded over to him. Atsushi could only stare for a few moments. Never had he seen a cat that followed a human around like a dog! It was sweet though. And surely Minya would like to lie by Asagi and purr. Incentive for him to lie down. “Come in and stay the night, Atsushi. You must be weary from traveling.”
“Thank you.” Atsushi was grateful for the invitation. Partially because he didn’t want to sleep outdoors again and partially because of what he was. A vampire could not enter someone’s home without their permission or invitation. If Asagi hadn’t expressed verbal permission then Atsushi wouldn’t be able to enter. And he did want to stay here.
He followed Asagi into the manor. A worried maid immediately pounced, taking the lantern from Asagi.
“A bath has been prepared for you and the doctor has already laid out your medicine. Would you like to take it with tea?” she asked, giving Atsushi a brief glance before returning her attention to Asagi. He could see that she genuinely cared about the other man. Servants who were treated well were always more likely to care for their employers.
Asagi brushed his hair back. “I’ll take my medicine later. Atsushi, would you like to bathe?”
“Yes,” Atsushi replied immediately. Although he liked the solitude that nature offered him, he loathed having to bathe in a stream.
He frowned as Asagi started to cough again. “Asagi… you need to take your medicine,” he said softly.
“He’s right,” the maid said.
“I’m fine,” Asagi insisted once he could breathe normally again. He sighed then leaned down to gather Minya into his arms. He cuddled the cat against his chest before glancing at Atsushi. “I’ll have the servants prepare a bath and a room for you. Are you hungry?”
The dreaded question. Atsushi would have to eat something later to avoid arousing suspicion but if he tried now, he would probably make himself ill. “No, I made myself dinner earlier.” His actual “meal” would have to wait until the majority of the household was abed. He felt terrible for preying on Asagi’s servants, but he needed blood.
Asagi nodded. “I’ll show you around the manor while your bath is being prepared.”
“What about yours?” Atsushi asked, frowning. “Won’t your bathwater get cold?”
Asagi shook his head. “The servants can always add extra heat to keep it warm for me.”
“I see.” Atsushi followed him as Asagi started to describe the manor. There were two levels in the manor. The family’s rooms were on the upper level while the kitchen, the study, and the servant’s quarters were on the lower level. There was also a cellar for storing wine and food. It seemed like a comfortable place to live. Especially when Asagi mentioned the natural hot spring a mere half hour’s ride from the manor. Atsushi would have to visit that when he left this place.
* * *
After bathing, a maid showed Atsushi to his room. It had the look of a room that hadn’t been lived in for some time. There were few personal effects to the room. There was a chest for clothes, a small table, and the futon that had already been laid out for him. The windows made him anxious though. They were glass and drawn with shutters, but the shutters still let in light. Atsushi would need to cover them to protect himself from the sun. That was a matter he could deal with later though. Until then he would enjoy the feeling of being properly clean, wearing clean clothing, and brushing his hair out with a proper comb instead of his fingers.
Atsushi was sitting on his futon doing just that when he sensed Asagi’s presence outside the room. He could see his outline through the shoji. Judging by the smell Asagi had brought some tea with him. Worried the other man would start coughing again and end up dropping the tea, Atsushi quickly got up so he could let Asagi into the room. Like him, Asagi’s hair was damp and he’d changed his clothing. He didn’t look quite so pale anymore either. But that was only from the heat of the water.
“Oh!” Asagi looked surprised. “I’m sorry… I’m sure you desire to rest but I thought you might like some tea.”
“I’m not tired,” Atsushi replied. “And I would like some tea.” He stepped aside so Asagi could enter. “How is your throat?”
Asagi sighed. “My throat and chest are sore from coughing. But,” he smiled sadly. “I’m used to it.” Atsushi wondered how often he was sick. Alarmed, he took the tray as Asagi started to cough. He held the tray with one hand then ushered Asagi over to the low table so he could sit. Once he’d done so Atsushi set the tray on the table. He filled a cup with the green tea then nudged it towards his host. Watching a coughing human made him anxious, especially if they were as kind and beautiful as Asagi.
“You should be resting,” Atsushi said softly. “Your health should be your priority not that of a simple traveler you’ve just met.” He didn’t want this man to exhaust himself for his sake. Atsushi wasn’t worth it and didn’t need to be tended to like a human.
Asagi coughed again then shook his head. “I would make a poor host if I focused solely on my health. And I have already spent most of the day abed… if I spent the rest of the night in bed as well I think I shall scream.”
Atsushi couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Such is the price of illness.” Asagi had yet to touch his tea so Atsushi, again, pushed the cup closer to him. This time Asagi took the unsubtle hint and sipped his tea. “Thank you for letting me into your home.”
He blinked as Asagi smiled again. Poor thing… he must be so lonely if this could make him so happy.
“You’re welcome. But how could I not have invited you? I would never force someone to stay out in the dark.”
“Are there any villages nearby?” This would give Atsushi a chance to learn what else was here besides the manor.
“Two hours by horseback. It’s a little remote, but my father wanted a peaceful location for when he grew weary of the city. My mother also stayed here during her pregnancies. It was more relaxing for her to live here than it was for her to be in Tokyo.”
Atsushi nodded. That was understandable. He was about to say something but paused as Asagi began to speak again. “My parents would like to spend more time here, but my father runs a business. If he isn’t in Tokyo then who will run the business for him? So he stays… he’ll bring me little presents and news. Until my family visits, the world might as well end with this manor. I know little of what goes on in the outside world.” He gave Atsushi a hopeful look.
The vampire sighed. “You won’t hear much from me. I’ve spent much of the last years away from the cities.” Not wanting to let the tea get cold, he took a sip. Ah… to have such delicious tea was a rare treat. He sipped it again then set the cup down. He could see that Asagi was burning with curiosity but too polite to simply start asking questions. “I’m a painter,” he explained. Sort of. He got bored out by himself and needed some sort of hobby to entertain himself. “I prefer the beauty of nature for my paintings. I seek out towns when I need food and grow weary of the woods.”
Asagi looked curious. “May I see your work?”
“Of course.” Atsushi left the table to get his pack. He opened it then pulled out the thick, waterproof case that he used to store his paintings. He handed it to Asagi, watching his face as he looked through Atsushi’s work. By no means did Atsushi think of himself as a master painter. Painting was something he’d enjoyed as a human and he’d continued to improve his paintings throughout his years as a vampire. And it gave him the perfect excuse for travelling. He could also sell paintings if he needed money for lodging or supplies.
“These are beautiful,” Asagi said, eyes wide as he looked up at Atsushi.
“Ah, they’re not that special,” Atsushi laughed awkwardly as he rubbed the back of his neck.
Asagi shook his head. “There’s no need to be modest! These are truly beautiful.”
“You can keep some of them if you like,” Atsushi replied.
Asagi’s eyes widened. “You would give me your paintings?”
“Of course. You’ve opened your home to me so I would like to give you something in return.”
Asagi beamed at him. “Thank you. May I… keep your roses?” He clearly loved roses.
Atsushi nodded, earning himself another happy smile. Looking at Asagi suddenly made him feel anxious. Staying for longer than this one night could be dangerous. Asagi was so sweet and charming that it’d be all too easy to care for him. To develop feelings for him. And what good would that do but shatter Atsushi’s heart into a thousand pieces? Asagi’s poor health proved that Death had already laid eyes on him.
“Thank you.” Asagi carefully set the paintings of roses aside. He abruptly started coughing again, almost dropping the case. He set it down then rubbed his chest. Worried, Atsushi moved over to him. Immediately he had to bite his lip. Asagi’s movements had made his yukata slip down to reveal more of his pale throat. Just one bite… Furious, Atsushi shoved the thoughts away. He would not bite Asagi. The vampire gently adjusted the yukata, fingers brushing Asagi’s skin. He jerked his hand back as he felt the heat radiating from Asagi’s skin. Now he was feverish.
He hesitated then abruptly lifted the other up into his arms. Surely this was unspeakably rude but Asagi was ill and needed to rest, whether he wanted to or not.
“Atsushi!” Alarmed, Asagi clutched the front of his yukata. “Please, put me down. I’m too heavy.”
“No you’re not. I know the thought of being confined to your bed again makes you want to scream but please, consider your health. You have a fever.”
Asagi sighed loudly as he relented. “All right.” He didn’t protest again as Atsushi carried him to his room. The servants must have prepared it for him while he was in the bath since the futon had been laid out for him. Atsushi gently set him on his futon before pulling back.
“Did you take your medicine?” The maid had mentioned medicine when Asagi first brought Atsushi into the manor.
“I have. The tea I brought you is supposed to help with my health… I thought it would do you good to have some as well. Traveling is always tiring.” Asagi sat up then raked his long hair back. “I’m sorry, I won’t be able to make a good host for you tonight.” He smiled sadly. “Again, my health confines me to my room.”
Atsushi pitied him. Asagi was so bright and lively… yet a prisoner in his own body. “Shh, there’s no need to apologize. You’ve been a wonderful host. You’ve given me a bath, some tea, and a place to stay the night. I couldn’t be happier.”
The words seemed to comfort Asagi. “I guess… I should get some sleep,” he said quietly. “And so should you. You must be tired.”
If only Asagi knew the truth. “I… I am not tired, actually. I mostly travel by night.” He didn’t want to confess his affliction to sunlight, but Asagi should know why his new guest would be unwilling to step outside during the day. And why he would cover the windows in his room.
Asagi’s eyes widened. “The night? Why? How can you possibly see well enough to travel?”
“I travel at night because I must,” Atsushi said quietly. “The sunlight, for some reason, bothers my skin. I feel ill if I stay out in daylight for too long. This is why I am so pale.”
Asagi bit his lip. “I’m sorry. That must be so difficult…”
“It can be. My eyes have learned to adjust to the darkness though and I have seen plenty of beautiful things at night.”
Asagi nodded. “I guess you won’t be tired for some time then. If you would prefer, a maid can cover the windows in your room so it’s easier for you to sleep.”
“Thank you.” Now Atsushi wouldn’t have to see how awkward it would be to request this himself. He took a step back. “I should let you rest.”
Asagi pulled his hair over his chest, absently running his fingers through it. He looked as if he wanted to continue the conversation. Atsushi wouldn’t mind speaking to him more… if Asagi were healthy. “If there’s something you need, send for one of the servants. They will tend to your needs.”
Atsushi decided he would borrow a lamp so he could paint in Asagi’s garden. It’d be interesting to paint by lamplight instead of moonlight or merely his own dark-accustomed eyes. “I will do so. Good night, Asagi.”
“Good night.” Atsushi waited until Asagi was lying down before leaving the room.
Notes
1) I'm going to work on the Art of Denial and try to get a chapter or two done while I figure out more details for Life or Death. I have a rough timeline figured out but I need to decide just how much of Asagi and Atsushi's relationship I want to write.
2) Poor Asagi... it's going to be hard to abuse him in this fic. He's so sweet and innocent.
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Date: 2013-07-11 03:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-07-11 08:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-07-11 08:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-07-11 07:42 am (UTC)First I was all....
and now I'm all...
God, the feels. So many feels. ;3; I haven't read a good AtsushixAsagi fic in a long time and this...I'm looking forward to it. ♥ I love how sweet and caring he is towards Asagi. And Asagi is so innocent fldsjafls;f;
You're one of my favorite D fanfiction writers, girl ;3; ♥
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Date: 2013-07-11 08:12 pm (UTC)Aw, thank you!
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Date: 2013-07-12 12:26 am (UTC)But I am looking forward to this fic!
;3;
Can't wait for the next chapter~
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Date: 2013-07-12 12:47 am (UTC)These two have been haunting me a lot today. They want to have their story told
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Date: 2013-07-12 04:58 am (UTC)It's easy to see that Atsushi is developing a fondness for Asagi even though he doesn't want to. And Asagi is so warm, welcoming, and trusting. A true gentle soul. To see him out in the garden at night singing to his beloved roses fits him perfectly in this.
I just know that as this continues on you're going to make me cry but I will be prepared for it lol I'll keep my tissues close by :)
Have to wonder if Atsu will steal from the garden and take a drink from one of the stable hands when all is quiet and the manor is asleep.
Looking forward to the next chapter. This was wonderfully written <3
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Date: 2013-07-12 07:44 pm (UTC)He is, but who wouldn't be able to become fond of Asagi? He's so sweet. It seemed like a very Asagi thing to do. He's kind of lonely, isolated out there so someone new is always interesting.
Probably, it gets pretty sad once Asagi has tuberculosis and is spitting up blood on an almost daily basis. Lol good plan!
He will, he'll feel horrible for doing it but he will. He does need blood to survive after all. And he'll need blood so he can try to act human
Thank you :)
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Date: 2013-07-12 07:04 pm (UTC)Looking forward to more chapters ^_^
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Date: 2013-07-12 08:26 pm (UTC)I like how you've used the more formal dialogue. Part of my novel is set in the same era so I had to do that too - mine got complicated further as one of my characters is English so I had to write it all in formal Victorian-ish English lol!
Can't wait to read more :)
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Date: 2013-07-13 02:32 am (UTC)It seemed necessary for a historical setting. Oh it is? Tricky! At least you're English so you have an advantage there
Muses are kind of fussy so can't promise how quickly I'll have the next chapter out.
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Date: 2013-07-14 09:49 pm (UTC)Yeah its really complicated to write so I'm considering changing it to just formalised English as I'm worried its a bit much and I'll lose readers interest ^^;;
lol yeah muses like to have fun like that! Mine have me all over the place at the moment!
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Date: 2013-07-14 09:56 pm (UTC)That might be easier for you and the reader. Especially if the character is difficult to understand (I'm not sure if s/he is or not but best to be careful)
They really do. And I've been struggling with writing the last few days. Everything I try to write sounds horrible. I at least have ideas but the actual writing just isn't working
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Date: 2013-07-17 10:31 pm (UTC)Oh no :( I know that feeling too well. Demon's Blood is kinda like that for me at the moment. I think the endless re-writes are getting to me :(
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Date: 2013-07-17 11:37 pm (UTC)It's getting better... my novel is quite active lol. Re-writes always do that :/
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Date: 2013-07-18 09:48 pm (UTC)That's good :D yeah I hate them XD gotta be done sadly but not enjoying it at the mo :(
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Date: 2013-07-24 09:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-07-26 06:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-07-26 10:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-07-26 10:22 pm (UTC)